Makhluk yang dari tiada kepada ada

And so another pregnant story is being added up on the 'road'. I have to say this, it's weird. I knew that I was 'processed' the same way, but, that's my mom, but these are my friends. Aren't they too advance? Or is it me who's actually late or lame? 

There was this game I played not so long time ago. I couldn't recall its name, but pretty much about life cycle of a person. Basically, I had to choose my life path. I started off as a baby, and schools, then after school was where I had to make a kinda huge decision. There were like, either career or continue to higher education level. And no matter how much was the frequency of me playing it, I would come to a point where I WILL get pregnant, and for every level elevated, I might even got twins. And then, I had to choose my retirement style. I remember the options, one was me living in the coolest apartment in the city, one was living in bungalows with garden, and the last option was like living a simplest life in a small and beautiful cottage with some chickens and animals..and plants..and soothing. 

Okey, suddenly these remind me about The Sims 2. I think this is gonna be a repetition as I think I told this 'lullaby' in one of the previous post. I managed to create a perfect world..err...life in there. I still remember we had neighbours like the Goth family, and some others where I customized them. I built a big mansion for mine, and of course I put "Nfive" as my family name. I was the housewife, had a husband who worked in hospital, one son and one daughter as to fit in our dining table. While my husband went to work, and right after I finished up all the chores, I would go out and get socialized with everyone and of course with Bella Goth. Hahaha. *Seriously

It was all happened right after I finished my SPM examination, on December 2006. During the days, I had to work in Mom's nursery(Taska Tunas Intelek), but at night, I would stick on the PC chair and my eyes would lock onto the monitor, playing this for at least 4 hours straight. And these were on-going for months long. Because for every normal Malaysian, they have almost six free-months for themselves before they move on to another path of their life; normal as in means of normal in my sense, nothing personal, k. I built, one step at a time, until every living in the game were finally had their own routine, until my idea stopped working like, stop, you know, just.. I had nothing to add. But I was happy, I remember. Because, whenever I put them into their bed, even my body itself felt this resting state. Like, I was doing what my virtual life did. I was into the game so much. I wanted my life to be that way. Even in all the other The Sims game versions, with that 'column' indicates the sanity of my character that I lived in, I felt the same. Especially when they were sleeping. I'll be like, "fiuuh.." and "fiuhhhh." Ahaha..

Until one night, when my supposed-to-be-another-same-plain night started, I found out my folder that I placed the saved games, including Pokemon Sapphires, were gone.  I felt like the world was falling apart right behind me. My mind wasn't fully functioned but I remember of thinking, "What should I do starting tomorrow night, and the night after tomorrow night, and the night after tomorrow tomorrow nights? My body was so shocked. I was shocked. I was blurred. I didn't know what to think beside that 'future sights'. My back was leaning tightly against the chair, and I was mad. I spent third quarter of my-only-one-month-left -before-I-enter-any-higher-education-institution break for building it and it even took my thoughts, mental and everything! But just like that, it's all gone. I didn't remember of scolding any of My Lillies about losing the files, but I do remember, my night routines just simply changed. I didn't even had the thought of building another one until today. The pain that I've been through after losing the files was too painful that the scar it leaves are still unhealed. There was a world I built, and suddenly everything disappeared. And I think on this very date, eight years ago was when I started playing them. While typing up all these, my heart still feel ache. Oh my.....





And what are above have any relation with my topic today? The value. The path. The cycle. For me, my realities aren't that awesome, so therefore, whenever there's an opportunities to make one, even virtually, I won't mind. My mind is full with imaginations, and I think, it's not that it will never happen in my realities. It will, but I need to wait a little more. And I think it won't be long from now. 

So, with 2014 is coming to its end. What I need to do now is to create another folder on my Facebook account, with the album named, "Foetus". Old Fren no.1 is on her way to deliver that creature. 

Despite all the, should I say, good news, I also received a news where one of my Old Fren got miscarriage when that creature was just about 3-4 weeks old. And that was like on October. I really have little time to write up anything these days. Dun worry bro, 'she' maybe just too shy to see the world. But I too, can feel the pain. 

And suddenly, I'm thinking about myself of getting pregnant. *gulp



Dear future-foetus-occupying-my-tummy(if you are exist),

I heard that your hair part will tickle me. I'm telling you, I won't like it. It gonna irritate me. And I simply don't like irritation.

Yours sincerely,
The owner-of-the-tummy-you-occupy-in.
27 Dec 2014
1000 hours



*p/s: Again, congratulation to all my friends who I only talk about lousy stuff and all for getting pregnant. It's still weird to think that you guys are experiencing them. Be ready for those mood-swing as we all have that built-in hormonal system. And to all my Old Frens(Mariam, Hasmi, Mira MGS, Atiqah D., Angah Aina, Farah), you guys babies are gonna call me Nanny, just..Nanny.