n~5ive

The recent event really had shaken things up. Even after a week, I cannot comprehend any of its logical. It's literally something that was not exist, but, this creature, simply created it, hence shattered people's heart and later, act innocent. And....not-so-surprising, this d****** has a biggest back-up. I DO NOT TRUST ANYTHING FROM NOW OWN. NOT A SINGLE THING. NOPE It was unexpected, that I did not even prepare my mind, even for 0.1%-ly. That, just really brought me back to where I wasn't even at the starting point. I......am becoming that monster again. Apparently, whatever you keep inside, will eventually appear to the outside. Without you really want it to be. But, what's the difference. Nobody is at my side, so what? SO F****** WHAT? But, perhaps, this time around, I have more power to change from the previous similar event, but.... I DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING. I WILL NOT. KEEP BELIEVE WHAT YOU HEAR FROM A THIRD PARTY. I DON'T CAR

Feeling? What is that? To be treated unkindly, I shall, it's just my food. But how irony is that, some think I should always be nice. I tell you, F8CK OFF It seems that many things are just remain the same, and it's so frustrating to know. Like, why? Why? F8CKING WHYYYYY????? If I could call myself 10 years ago, lacking in so many areas, as stupid, that's because I really was. But, do I just stay being stupid? I can't let that happen. And, here I am. Which I hope, I would be given the chance to maintain whatever I've been working on. But I seriously start to have an allergy reaction toward stupidity. For God sake. But WHY........ Why one can let that happen to them? Do they not realize it?  The worst thing about being stupid is to be heartless. Unkind. Sickening. And I did all those before.  And what I mean by heartless is, I had no feeling. I did have tears rolled down onto my cheeks, but that's that.  I can't ev